Tales of a South Park Freshman
by InkyPawz07
Summary: South Park always had something interesting to offer. Especially the love and friendship drama. New students,new crushes, new life lessons yet to be learned. It's all here in South Park, so leave your woes behind. Rated T for language :D What'd you expect? It's South Park,silly!
1. Stan Time

The South Park High bell rang, and everyone stampeded out the door, quite the normal occurence. I was in no hurry to get home, so I slugged through the halls, taking my time and studying each and every room, like I hadn't seen them about a thousand times, but, who was there to judge? I leisurely made my way up to the doors, being the last one out. Or, so I thought.

"Sup, dipshit?"

Oh shit. That familiar voice. I certainly was in even less of a hurry to turn around. I watched Eric out of the corner of my eye.

"What do you want, fatass?"

I spat, not exactly enjoying his company. I started trudging up the sidewalk, hoping that I could avoid conversation and just get away by going a little bit faster than Cartman. (_Which wasn't too difficult.)_

"Why all of a sudden are you concerned about what's up with me?"

Cartman punched my arm.

"Would you rather I not care?"

I mumble-laughed under my breathe, lucky enough that the screams from the rest of the freshman's blocked me out. Tucking my textbooks under my jacket so they would get soaked in the falling snow, I walked a little faster, nearly trotting. Looked like my discomfort was showing, Eric crossed the street and joined the other high schoolers. I exhaled aloud and kept on walking, still feeling uncomfortable with the fact I wasn't by myself. I just had a strange feeling that I wanted to be alone, away from all my friends and classmates. It wasn't anything personal, I just wanted some time to myself. I slowed my walking when I eventually saw all the highschoolers disappear over the hill. I nearly screeched out of surprise when I felt a punch to my arm. What was it everyone loved about my arms today? (I knew they were pretty nicely toned, pretty muscled if I do say so myself, not to brag, but I was pretty proud of them.)

"Wassup Stan-ey boy?"

A familiar, partially muffled voice caught my attention, and I gladly responded.

"Not much Ken, you?"

He had his hood up to cover his head from the snow, it was rare for Kenny to wear his hood up now,

"Why you walking by yourself?"

"I don't know... I just wanted some time alone I guess. Away from the hollering stampede of what we call our fellow freshmans."

I saw the look on Kenny's face and restated,

"Not anything against you Ken, I don't mind talking to you. So-"

Before I could finish, Kenny knocked into a pole, and dropped to the ground.

"What the hell!? Where did- You killed Kenny!"

I pointed at the pole and paused, instinctively looking around for Kyle. Where is that guy when you need him? _Well, guess its up to me._ I thought, and pointed back at the pole.

"You bastard!"

* * *

I belly-flopped onto my bed and buried my head in the pillow._ Watching Kenny die so much actually gradually gets disturbing. _I thought, and picked my head up from the suffocating pillow, gasping for breath. Interrupting the one moment of silence I had, my phone beeped. I unwillingly picked up my cellphone from the nightstand, flipping it open impatiently to find a text from my girlfriend Wendy.

**When r we going 2 get together again, Stan? We haven't hung out for, like, ever!  
****Wendy**

With a few taps of my phone keyboard I texted back.

**Idk.**

I waited about a half hour with no reply. I slammed my bedroom door behind me as I trudged out and headed for the living room. I picked up my guitar hero controller and flipped through the TV inputs. I started the console and waited for it to load. The screen popped up with song choices. I flipped through them uninterestedly, until I found it. I grinned at the song choice and postitioned my controller.

**She eyes me like a pisces when I am weak...  
I've been locked inside your heart shaped box, for weeks.  
I've been drawn into your tar pit magnet trap.**

I loved this Nirvana song, every time it played it gave me goosebumps.

**Hey! Wait! I've got a new complaint!  
Forever in debt to your priceless advice.**

My moment of awesomeness was interrupted by a loud yell.

"Turn it down, turd! I'm going to flipping come down there and kick your ass!"

Rolling my eyes with a smile, I paused the game and turned the TV down a few decibels. I wasn't afraid of my sister anymore, she couldn't hurt me any longer. Being the 'little' brother that I was, I still let her rule over me for her satisfaction. I didn't know why I wanted her to be happy, when she never wanted it for me, or never cared. But like I said, being the 'little' brother, I always wanted her to appreciate me and did everything I could to make that happen, and as you can probably guess, never happened. I got over it a little bit before high school, when I began to tower over her at least a foot. Being 14, it wasn't that much of a surprise that I was taller than my 17 year-old sister, she was a girl, so nothing was severlely abnormal in the Marsh household. Not yet at least.

Getting bored all of a sudden, I shut the Xbox down and slipped back into my room, seeing a flashing light from my cellphone lying on the bed. With high hopes, I flipped the top up only to see the name '**Kyle**'. What could he possibly want? I loaded the message that read simply,

**Hey Stan. Sup?**

I raised an eyebrow. Kyle didn't text that often, this seemed off.

**Not much, what's going on?**

I waited a minute, hoping the right emotion and right question registered.

**Same here. **

That was what I was afraid of.

**No man, I meant what's the problem.**

**Problem? I don't have one. What's up with you Stan?**

**Nothing. You don't txt much, wondring if there wuz smthing wrong.**

Ugh, I felt feminine being so lazy with my writing. Looks like it was showing not only to me.

**Haha, didn't know wanting to talk to you was a crime. (And nice text method, gurlll. XD)**

I frustratedly slapped a hand to my forehead. Great, now I looked gay. I laid my head back down on my pillow, without texting Kyle back. I was definitely not in the mood to talk to anyone. I just needed some time to myself for once, Stan-time only.


	2. Learn From Your Mistakes

What was going on with Stan? I started to wonder if **_he_** was okay, he seemed much different. He didn't talk to me once at school today, and I waited for the longest time for him to leave school so we could talk on the way home like we always did. He seemed conceited today, and that wasn't the usual Stan. Then a thought popped into my head, what if Wendy and Stan's relationship was bringing him down? Stan hadn't even puked when he saw Wendy in the past few weeks. I felt terrible for my best friend. I hoped this wasn't the case, but it seemed like the closest and most likely answer. I only wanted the best for Stan, and knew he wanted the same for me. Trying to force the negative thought out of my mind, I tried convincing myself that Stan was probably just finally getting used to their being together. Interrupting any deeper thought, my bedroom door swung open.

"Hey butthole!"

Ike semi-greeted in his innocent 4-year-old voice. I picked him up and shook

my head,

"No no Ike, don't say that. That's... Not a good word."

Ike waddled away, and sat pudgily on my floor.

"But you says it."

"Doesn't matter Ike, just don't say that!"

"Cookeh Monserhhh."

He cooed, waddling out the door. He was still obsessed with Cookie Monster, never really ended. Getting up from my bed, I shut my door and shook my head.

"Better that than butthole for a greeting. I really need to buy a lock for my door."

I mumbled to myself, going to sit back down on my bedside, deep in thought. I actually enjoyed deep thought sometimes, at least it was something to occupy myself with. But, just one problem. What was I thinking about again...?

* * *

My mood swing was miraculous the next day. I felt the complete opposite, I felt like I could talk forever. I didn't know what I had to say, but I most likely would figure it out. I energetically sprinted down the street to High School. I spotted Kenny, Kyle, and Cartman standing by the flag pole, and trudged through the snow to talk to them.

"Hiya guys."

I hyperly greeted. Kyle had a look of shock on his face, like he had just witnessed a murder.

"Hey, what's up with the mood swing dude?"

"Yeah, you were acting like a dink the other day."

Cartman insulted, to which I've learned to fully ignore.

"Mphhh margph."

Muffled Kenny.

Looked like Kenny had decided to wear the hood up for old times sake.

"If this is 20 questions, you're going too quickly for me."

I mumbled, to which Kyle replied,

"Apparently not too much of a difference."

I lowered a brow and kept silent. The bell rang and everyone rushed inside in a big hurry, which I would never understand. I definitely wasn't in a hurry to get to class, and neither were my friends. We waited until they were all inside and began walking. Kenny lay on the pavement, in a squished heap.

"**Oh my god!**"

I shrieked.

"They killed Kenny!"

Kyle stood with a paralyzed look, and raised a fist. (You would think we'd have gotten used to his several death's by now, but...)

"YOU BASTARDS!"

Kenny suddenly rose up into a crouched position, and cheered with a thumbs up.

"Damnit!"

Kyle choked out in dismay. To his immediate pleasure once again, the flagpole collapsed and burst into flames, squishing and undeniably killing Kenny. Kyle mouthed the word 'Yes!' and pumped his fist. He gave a comically ecstatic grin.

"They've killed Kenny! You bastards!"

* * *

I shot glances at Stan, inattentive to Mr Garrison's lecture. Stan was sitting behind his desk, his fist under his chin with a disinterested look on his face. I was unaware that I was doing the same thing until I looked away, and it seemed Stan was quite attentive not to notice my eyes on him. How could he not be though? I pitied anyone who had to sit next to_ Butters_. You had to fake attentiveness if you wanted to escape Butters talking your ears off. The classes attention quickly turned to the door, as Kenny walked in with a late pass. He handed it to and pulled out a chair next to me.

" You're the 8th wonder of the world, Kenny, you know that?"

I whispered in his ear as he bent down to sit. Kenny grinned, (Not that anyone who hasn't known him since preschool could tell behind that hood) and took his seat. The bell rang as concluded the lesson, and the class herded out more excitedly than when they stampeded _in _to school in the morning. Kenny gave a muffled cheer, and I could tell my friends thought the same as me, _'What a lucky guy, didn't even have to withstand a minute of class.'_ I walked out the door alongside Stan, and tried to think of a conversation topic. Luckily, I didn't have much thinking to do.

"I wonder how Kenny will manage to kill himself tomorrow."

Stan spoke up. I nodded, going in to deep thought. Stan had a good point, we really never thought of how Kenny would die the next day.

"Wouldn't surprise me if it were twice in one day, I mean, he already died once today, and it's just the start of the day."

Stan nodded in agreement and slid down the stair rail to the lunchroom. It was no surprise to anyone that Cartman was the first in line, that selfish fatass couldn't drop a crumb on the floor and leave it be. Stan shook my shoulder savagely,

"K-kyle?"

I looked to him, the space between our faces almost uncomfortable. Refusing to look into my eyes, he continued to stare in front of him.

"Oh shit dude..."

My eyes widened.

"Da fuq dude!? What?!"

He shook his hand, still pointing, trying to gesture in front of us.

"Oh...Shit..."

I whispered back. We both watched in horror as Kenny walked closer and closer to a puddle of soda.

"Kenny!" we shouted, trying to distract Kenny long enough to save his life. Or many lives, that is. Sometimes I wonder if he's even alive...

"Mph? Mppph mmmffffff!"

He waved, continuing to walk. Before we could stop him, he lost his footing and smacked onto the floor, kicking over the janitors bucket of water onto the electrical outlet, therefore... Electrocuting Kenny...

Stan and I stood motionless, with paralyzed looks. Stan sighed.

"That answers our question."

* * *

I turned my head back to Kyle. We all knew Kenny would come back to life in no time. I opened my mouth to comment, but shrugged and punched his arm lightly, gesturing for him to follow.

"I wish Kenny would stop dying."

"It's not his fault, dude, it's not like he's suicidal or whatever." Kyle replied, lowering a brow. I knew Kenny wasn't suicidal, what brought that up? I went into my silent state again and continued walking beside Kyle, whom was going slightly faster than I. It didn't seem like we had any goal, we were just walking. I decided to speak up and ask just that.

"Where exactly are we going?"

Kyle gave me a quizzical look. What? He had never heard of a question?

"Uh, outside." He poked my forehead. I pulled away awkwardly, shooting a quizzical look back at him.

"Where's your head, Stan? Something on your mind?"

I lost the quizzical look and looked down at the tiled floor. "Nope." I replied simply. It did seem like I had something on my mind that I wasn't aware of. My train of thought was intterupted when I was knocked into with a little squeak from whatever I bumped into. I glanced downward to find Bebe on the floor.

"Oh, Stan!" She clasped her hands together as she spoke. She seemed excited. Why would Bebe be excited to see **me?**

She sighed heavily, and grasped the back of her neck with one hand. "Phew... Umm.."

I turned my hand over a few times, gesturing 'spit it out.'

"Stan... Wendy is breaking up with you." she croaked, and pouted sadly.

I froze. This was the second time. I could never seem to get **anything **right with that girl! I felt anger overpower the sadness.

"Why couldn't** she** tell me this? Instead of getting one of her 'bff's to come tell me!? What is wrong with **me?** Am I not good enough for her? What have I done?" I hollered, noticing my voice building up. I wasn't one to lose my temper, but this time, I had really had enough. Bebe looked up at me with innocent eyes, looking like she was about to bawl with fear. I especially wasn't one to hurt or knock fear into the hearts of women. Her emotions almost immediatley turned to blind rage.

"You never bother to even talk to her, you ignorant bastard! That would be the least you could do! I can see why she is breaking up with **you!** I think you can guess what's wrong with you. I don't think she'll want to be 'just friends' this time."

With that, I got a burning slap to my face. It didn't sting, it burned. The slap echoed throughout the school halls, surprising me that none of the teachers came running out to see if it had been a gunshot. I almost smiled over the pain, she had a way with words I would never understand. It would take me one whole night of thinking to come up with those words. The door in front of me slammed, and Kyle's hand gripped my arm.

"God... Oww." he whined, gesturing towards my face as if he could feel it too. I looked over my shoulder to the mirror. A bright red hand mark took up most of my cheek. Wonderful. Bebe slammed the door, emmiting an odd squishing noise. Kyle and I exchanged looks. Great, a puddle of pure Kenny all over the floor. Again... Wonderful.


End file.
